li_amaranth | Genessia IC Inbox

[She just reluctantly nods.]

I've been fighting for so long.. and loosing to the fox just.. shattered something. I can't keep fighting anymore, Styxx. I've been trying. I'm..

[Her voice seemed to cease up when she wanted to try and tell him just what it was doing to her. How it was trying to kill her and make her loose herself and just couldn't.]

It's trying to kill you and make you lose yourself and you can't let that happen, right?

[Wow, that was almost like he'd plucked that right out of her mind. That was because he had. He tried to stay out of people's minds, but he couldn't help but pick up on the surface thought.]

[She tensed slightly and just nodded. Was what she was thinking that obvious to figure out? Li glanced away after a moment and just started walking towards her cave, trusting him to follow.

There were magical barriers over her home to protect her and to keep it warm and dry thanks to Gellert. She just quietly set down the drawing with the rest and sighed.]

There's more than one way to kill a creature, you know. The rest of my herd.. suicide. The curse made them and I refuse to let it do that to me. It's... just harder now.

[Seeing as Styxx didn't mean her any harm, it was unlikely the barrier would affect him beyond him taking notice of it being there as he followed her in.]

Why is it harder now?

[She tensed and growled faintly, despite it sounding weary as she just settled on straightening up the stacks of sketches and drawings he made for her over the last few weeks.]

It just is okay.

[With how much her anger was cooling off since the fight with the fox and the addition of water calming her down, it's harder to fight when she can't get as angry as she did before.]

Has your motivation to return to your original form lessened?

[She shook her head.]

No, it hasn't. I want my form back more than anything else. Especially right now.

Then what's different? Something's changed.

[She nodded slightly. Yeah, a lots changed.]

The fox nearly killed me. I just.. the fucking bastard proved his point, okay? I shouldn't be fighting.I'm just.. some stupid female with an attitude like he said.

I couldn't defeat him and I couldn't defend my herd. I'm a fuck up of a lead mare, okay.

Then get better. Get stronger. Learn to fight better. Just because you lost one fight doesn't mean you stop fighting. It doesn't mean you're weak or stupid. It just means you have to try harder.

I'm tired of it, okay!?

[She growled and turned towards him.]

How can I get stronger when I'm fucking starving even after eating someone down to the bone!? There's... I've been fighting this fucking thing for three hundred years. I've out last the last of my herd by a hundred and fifty and I'm just... Fucking tired of it and what the hell it's doing to me.

I want my form back.. Gellert's working on it and I want the rest of me back as well!

[She wanted her name back.. she wanted the curse to stop trying to make her feel guilt for what happened that night and all the lives she's taken just to survive! Li was getting desperate and to her, it felt like Gellert was her last hope. If he couldn't break this.. if he and Albus failed.. Li was dead.

At least, she thought so.]

I know exactly where you're coming from, Li. I've been cursed. I've been alone. I've wanted it all to end. I was trapped on a vanishing isle for 11,000 years alone. I was put in Tartarus not long after that for wanting to die. For wanting it all to end, so if you're tired of it, I won't tell you not to be. I won't dictate what you should or shouldn't do Li. I'm merely saying that I'm willing to help if I can. Whether that means training you to be stronger or helping with your curse or both it matters not.

[Then... he really did know where she was coming from and he'd had it worse than she did. Li just became still and then just kind of lost whatever fire had started and nodded.]

...Fine. Help me somehow.

Genessia IC Inbox

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]

Re: [Action]